ERECTILE DYSFUNCTION AS A VARIANT OF SKOTOTROPISM
I do not know how to ripen when my lover undresses
this was not how we began I have a history of ripening
in public places—at Dominos when she rubbed my thighs
under the table, with her feet. in church when she hugged
me tightly, whispered I want it her tongue flicking
my ear—I was born chasing light. never one to turn
eyes from the sun. so
where did the body learn this allergy this
aversion to turgidity my lover undresses & I stay drooped
like a towel silent as a table. no one teaches you
how to grieve an erection this is a side effect
of buying happiness from the psychiatrist the meds
mistake your hardness for an obstacle liquefy your resolve.
luster peeling off my skin,
I miss the days when
staring at a mannequin too long could stir
uprisings in my shorts …
—from Rattle #65, Fall 2019
Tribute to African Poets
__________
Pamilerin Jacob: “I am a Nigerian poet and mental health enthusiast. My idea of fun is a bowl of chocolate ice cream and Khalil Gibran’s poetry. I hope to be a lecturer someday. I write poetry because it is the only place where the past can be stilled, looked in the eye, and torn into. A cat person, I enjoy listening to Thich Nhat Hanh’s talks on mindfulness.” (web)
