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      May 12, 2014Number 32Tony Gloeggler

      Today I am taking the A Train
      away from Duke Ellington’s
      Harlem and into East New York,
      Brooklyn. This beautiful tall blonde
      and I are the only two caucasians
      in the crowded car. With each stop,
      we move closer, pulled
      together by some unnamed force.
      We both know not to look
      at anyone too long and even
      when I make eye contact
      with her, I pause for less
      than a second before rushing
      to read advertisements for laser
      surgery. I am not scared,
      not worried, just incredibly aware
      of how white, like a bleached
      sheet drying on a line, I feel.
      I want to lean, whisper
      in a cool, irresistible way
      for her to come to my place
      so we can hurry up and start
      making some more of us,
      when this young, buffed,
      light skin, black man, struts
      onto the train wearing
      a Buffalo Bills number 32
      Simpson jersey, and I want
      to know what it means
      to him and everyone else.
      Is it sweep right, OJ gliding
      behind Reggie McKenzie,
      piling up 2000 yards? OJ
      hurtling suitcases in crowded
      airports for Hertz, guest
      starring on the Love Boat?

      This guy in the jersey must
      remember that slow motion
      car chase interrupting the Knick
      playoff game? OJ’s murdered
      white ex-wife and the white guy
      who drove her home? Johnny
      Cocharan? Me, I was working
      at the group home, the only
      white person on the payroll
      with people I still call friends
      when the not guilty verdict
      was announced. I watched
      Jean fall to her knees, thank
      Jesus as her arms reached
      for the ceiling. Annette twiriled
      in a circle clapping so hard
      that sparks of sweat shot out.
      The two men shook hands.
      I wasn’t quite sure why,
      but I realized it was a time
      when we couldn’t say anything
      to each other. I walked outside,
      sat on the stoop and waited
      for yellow buses to bring
      our boys home from school.
      Back on the subway, that guy
      is talking to the woman, jotting
      numbers on a scrap of paper
      and she’s smiling, touching
      her pretty blonde hair while folding
      the paper in her jacket pocket.
      Maybe she will call him tomorrow.
      They can go for drinks or dinner
      or dancing. Maybe they will fall
      in love, spend their honeymoon
      searching for the real killers.

      from #23 - Summer 2005